Tuesday is for Trying Something New

Today was Mackenzie’s very first day in real day care. It went so much better than I expected — for both of us.

Over the last couple of months I have waffled back and forth between wanting to go back to a regular job and wanting to be home with Mackenzie full-time. I pursued some opportunities that were opening up, but for different reasons, every door I tried closed.

I learned so much in the process.

The work I do is in demand, and my skills are in demand. However, the market itself is intense, and I’m not ready to give up days, nights, and weekends — and miss all that time with my daughter — for a career opportunity, no matter how attractive it may be. I won’t even throw my hat in the ring.

I also learned that I’m not okay with just any child care solution for Mackenzie, and I don’t want to be away from her 40 hours a week. I want to be the primary caregiver and teacher in her life right now. I don’t want to miss a moment with her.

At the same time all of that has been going on, my freelance work has really started picking up. The projects I am working on are challenging and exciting, and my clients are fantastic.

SO, Chris and I finally decided to try a compromise that gives Mackenzie more time with other kids and other caregivers and gives me some dedicated time to work. I found a child care center/pre-school that I love, and we’ve committed to just two days a week.

So today was our first day. Mackenzie was a champ, and I tried not to be a wreck. I got some work done and had lunch with Chris, called to check on Mackenzie twice, and picked her up even earlier than I had planned. But all in all, it was a good day.